Personal Stories

Singing for Lillian…93 and Ready to Die (Kate, Sept. 2001)

Lillian was 93, had unsuccessfully attempted suicide, and was ready to die. She had decided to take no more food or water, and her daughter called me to ask if we would sing for her mom. The two Nancy’s and I each knew her daughter and were happy to sing for Lillian the next day.

Lillian’s last words were her welcome to us. We sat around her bed with her daughter, her niece, and a friend behind us (a placement I would change another time - it would have been better to all be in a circle, I think, but hard to play musical chairs at a time like this.)

I felt good to be able to address Lillian’s intention, to help her family get aligned with her wishes and to be able to be forthright about "letting go." I know our presence and our singing served her family profoundly - they were able to grieve and allow Lillian to pursue her path gracefully. She died peacefully five days later.